DIVORCE , the word that sounds like a curse word every time you hear it. Even if the act was amicable, even if it was done for the betterment of both parties involved, it is still a very painful word and a very hard situation to go through. Having gone through it myself I can proclaim that it certainly made me a stronger woman and mother. Divorce can also be an expensive journey lasting months and sometimes even years. Mine fortunately was over and done in six months but the scars last forever. I was married for seven years and divorced before our son was eight years old. He still harbors resentment, and the longing of not having his father under the same roof with him is still very real. I was fortunate that as a union member we get free legal aid. As the Eastbay Frugal Mama I wanted to go the cheapest route to get out of my marriage. I utilized my legal aid benefits and got an attorney and my divorce granted for practically “free”. I didn’t use a coupon but I was thankful to have the luxury of using the benefits that I had been paying into for five years! It doesn’t matter if your divorce was free, cost $199 on Legalzoom.com, or cost several thousand dollars with a lawyer, it is a trying, hurtful time and for me has resulted me into using coupons.
I was always pretty thrifty before and during my marriage, however since pinching pennies has gained a new meaning. I had an ex who wasn’t gainfully employed at the time of our demise and to this day I have yet to receive a dime of child support. Granted my son’s father has chipped in and bought him new clothes, shoes , and has paid for extra -curricular activities, but nothing is more valuable than quality time and attention. This is one thing that neither my son , or I signed up for I expected not only for my ex to provide monthly financial support of some sort, as well as his time and love to my child. Unfortunately, we do not live in a perfect world and this normal activity does not occur for us. That being said, Frugal Mama has been in full effect saving dollars and cents on my son’s clothes, shoes, video games, (used from Game Stop) and everything else including sports and tutoring. I just signed him up for tutoring through Huntington Learning Center on Groupon.com. You get an assessment and ten tutoring sessions with a certified teacher for only $99!
It has all helped us tremendously! Cutting corners allows my son to get the fun things and designer clothes that he needs or (wants)and be able to thrive academically! I’m sure my ex husband would do better if he knew better and realistically , that is something I try my best not to be concerned with. I have moved on and have a man in my life that treats my son like his very own. Even with the financial help and quality parenting my boyfriend gives my child, divorce is always an unforgettable event that is life changing for all parties all involved. You just have to navigate through all the bumps in the road,give as much time and attention to your children and reassure them that it’s not their fault, and you certainly can’t scan a coupon on that.
Smooches ! and frugality folks…